We were at a Japanese steakhouse surrounded by other people at our hibachi table. I saw my five year old son had a mosquito bite on his face. I said “Hey, you have a mosquito bite on your face.” He said, “So do you.” And pointed to the large zit I had on my chin. Thank you, son. Thank you.
I was at a party and my niece had one of those children’s cameras that when you take a picture it pretends it took a picture. The pictures are just random cartoonish people. She pretended to take a picture of my sister’s friend. Then she showed her the picture. The picture was a man with a mustache and glasses. My sister’s friend said, “That doesn’t look like me.” My niece said, “Yes it does. He has glasses and you have glasses. He has a mustache and you have a mustache.” Oh, the embarrassment…because it was true! I literally felt the embarrassment for her on such a deep level because it could’ve been any one of us, right? We all have had those “mustache” days!
I was at Walmart trying to finish up grocery shopping. My two year old son said he had to go to the bathroom. Now… we had already gone twenty minutes before and my cart was so full it was getting difficult to maneuver. So, I kept telling him he was going to have to wait a minute. He got frustrated and starting YELLING at the top of his lungs, non-stop, for all to hear, “I have to go poop and mommy said no!” After the fourth time, needless to say, his wish was granted.
Again, grocery shopping with my three year old son at Walmart, I was in the dairy isle getting milk. He wanted the chocolate milk. I said no and got the white milk. And with several people standing right beside us, he says very loudly and angrily, “You’re so SELFISH!” This is how I learned that he had learned a new word. I was so shocked that such a big word came out of his little mouth that it took me a minute to respond. I stupidly looked at the people around me, half laughing, trying to explain that I was not in fact selfish. No one cared.
I was having lunch at Chic-fila with a new mom friend from my church. As we are talking, I looked into the play area and saw a man dressed in full army fatigues bending down to tie his daughter’s shoes. I then saw my four year old son jump around this stranger’s neck and ride him like a bucking bronco! I was mortified as I quickly entered the play area and grabbed my son from a top this innocent bystander. Ummm…there really isn’t anything to say about this except it was not a proud moment and it made me reevaluate where I was going wrong in my parenting!
Now can you top these?! Please do share, so that we can all feel better about ourselves.
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